I skipped my annual performance review meeting by claiming a sudden internet outage at my apartment.

I found a wallet with more money than I have earned and I returned it without keeping any.

I let a stray cat into my garage during a freezing storm, fed it for a week, and then dropped it off at a shelter without telling anyone.

My roommate always leaves his wet towels on the couch, so I started putting them directly inside his laundry hamper soaking wet.

I watch terrible Hallmark Christmas movies in the middle of July just to feel a shred of serotonin.

My husband’s country club rival tried to humiliate him at the annual dinner. I quietly spilled red wine on his wife’s $4,000 gown in the powder room.

The last photo of us together shows that we were smiling but now everything has changed forever.

My parents told everyone my brother moved abroad for a prestigious fellowship, but he is actually in rehab.

I let my best friend pay for my dinner last week even though I just received my paycheck earlier that morning.

I used a fake name and burner email to critique my company's poor leadership policies on an anonymous feedback board.

I matched with my boss’s husband on a discreet location-based app. He offered to pay my rent if I kept it quiet, and I haven’t said no yet.

I intentionally applied to a company just to see how low their salary offer would be, and they actually met my demands.

I eat a bowl of instant ramen with American cheese melted into it when nobody else is home to judge me.

A guy mansplained my own job to me, so I secretly changed his default font in Word to Wingdings.

I feel like an outsider looking into my own family gatherings, like a ghost who doesn't quite belong at the table.