I told my friends I hate chocolate just so nobody would ever ask me to share my secret stash of expensive truffles.

My old high school locker combination still randomly pops into my head, and it feels like a relic from a different lifetime.

I told my dentist I floss every single night, but I only flossed ten minutes before walking into the clinic.

Our director of operations spends most of his workday playing mobile gacha games under his standing desk.

I feel like everyone around me has life figured out while I am just stumbling through the dark.

I took a lower-stress role with less pay just so I could stop having stress-induced migraines every Sunday evening.

I eat raw cookie dough straight from the tub while watching reality TV drama on my phone.

I secretly hope you and your ex never get back together, even though I pretend to support your happiness.

I eat spoonfuls of crunchy peanut butter mixed with maple syrup straight out of the jar while watching horror movies.

The real me has never been what anyone thinks I am because I have been hiding behind a mask since childhood.

I told my gym trainer I do meal prep every Sunday, but my "meal prep" is just ordering 5 days worth of takeout.

I left my dream job because the commute was too much and no one else knows why I quit.

Every person I have ever truly loved has eventually moved away or cut ties with me. At this point, I think I am the common denominator.

I rejected a higher offer from a top startup because their Glassdoor reviews warned about toxic micromanagement.

I laugh at jokes I don't understand during group hangouts just so people won't look at me awkwardly.